Mobile Phones

Wife ko Begum kyon kehte hai

Wife ko Begum kyon kehte hai
Kyonki shaadi ke baad saare gum to
Husband ke hisse mein aate hain or
Wife Be-Gum ho jaati hai

A perfect gift for u!

A perfect gift for u!
Absolutely no cost, no batteries required,
Non-taxable, silent performance,
Extremely personal, fully returnable
It’s a SMILE from me to u!

Wife: I will die

Wife: I will die
Husband: I will also die
Wife: Why will you die
Husband: Because main itni khushi
Bardasht nahin kar sakta
When a man steals your wife
there is no better revenge than
to let him keep her.

1 tree can start a forest,

1 tree can start a forest,
1 smile can start a friendship
1 touch can show love and care
person like u can make life worth living
One tree can start a forest,
One smile can start a friendship
One touch can show love and care
One person like you can make life worth living!

It’s a SMILE from me 2 you

A perfect gift 4 you
Absolutely no cost, no batteries required,
Non-taxable, silent performance,
Extremely personal, fully returnable
It’s a SMILE from me 2 you
Husband: You will never succeed
in making that dog obeys you!
Wife: Well, it?s only a matter of patience,
I had a lot of trouble with you at first.

A Wife hit her Husband with a Frying Pan

A Wife hit her Husband with a Frying Pan
Husband:What was THAT 4
Wife:I found a paper in ur pocket, with the name Jenny on it.

Wife:What is 10 years with me?

Wife:What is 10 years with me?
Husband:A second.
Wife:What is $1000 for me?
Husband:A coin.
Wife: Ok give me a coin.
Husband:Wait a second

I was in love

After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, You know, I was a fool when I married you.
The husband replied, Yes, dear, but I was in love and didnt notice.

Diff between Dava & Daru

What’s the diff between Dava & Daru?
Dava is like girlfriend,
that comes with expiry date and Daru is like wife,
Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.

Dost kabhi apni

Dost kabhi apni wife ko naraz na karna,kyouki ye hi aap ke taqdeer ka khazana hai,us ko naraz kya matlab aap ne apne naseeb ko naraz kya……

Wht iz ten years wid me?

Wife:Wht iz ten years wid me?
Husband:A second.
Wife:Wht iz $1000 4 me?
Husband:A coin.
Wife: Ok give me a coin.
Husband:Wait a second
Me apni wife se bahat mohabbat karta hoon.par kya karu wo mujh se naraz hai.

Biwi Ghusse Main

Biwi Ghusse Main
Tumhare Dimagh Main To
Sirf Gobar Hi Bhara Hai..!!
Husband Payar Se
To Phir Itni Dayer Se Kha kyun Rahi Ho
Husband to a newly wed wife!
I could go to the end of the world for you
Wife:Thanks,but promise me
you will stay there for the rest of your life.

Wife cam hom wid a goat.

Wife cam hom wid a goat.
Husband asked”Iz bhains ko ghar kion lai ho?”
Wife:”Dikhta nahin, bakri ha!”
Husband:”Bakri sa hi poch raha hon”
Man: Sir, my wife is missing.
Postmaster:bhai ye post office hai,
police station me complain dijiyee.
Man:Kia karon, khushi k mare
kuch samajh nahin aa raha

Wife:Who jo samnay admi drnk kar rah hai

Wife:Who jo samnay admi drnk kar rah hai ,
Usko mainne ten saal phele shaadi se inkar kia tha..
Aaj tak sharab pe raha hai
Husband: Itni lambi celebration.
Husband wife mein larai hoi,
Husband ghar se chala gaya,
Husb:Rat ko phone pay,”Khanay mein kia hai”
Wife:Zeher.
Husb:Mai dair se aonga, tum kha kar so jana:

Janu kash aap SMS hotay

Wife:
Janu kash aap SMS hotay,
Main aap ko save karlati,
Husband:
Jaan-e-man, kaash tum ring tone hoti,
Main her haftay tumhe change karta

Your dad paying the bill !!!

Wife: yesterday-night I saw a dream
That u were sending me
Jewelry and clothes!
Husband: yeah, I saw
your dad paying the bill !!!

A small argument between a couple

A small argument between a couple turns violent.
Angry Husband: Do not let the animal in me come out!
Wife: who is scared of a mouse!

Difference between Husband & gadha.

Ans:Husband gadha ban sakta hai,
but
Gadha itna bhi gadha nahi k husband bane!!

Mechanical engineer wife

mechanical engineer wife
calls his husband and said:
Your spare part has arrived (you become a father)
Husband replied: check it below there is Nut of Bolt.

Still have my wife…

A recently fired
stock trader said …

“This is worse than divorce…
I have lost everything
and
I still have my wife…”

Wife: I will die.

Wife: I will die.
Husband: I will also die.
Wife: Why will you die?
Husband: Because main itni khushi
Bardasht nahin kar sakta.

It connects me & you.

Q na hum apni shadi ki salgirah pr
dawat k lye bakra ziba karen?
Shohar: ghalti to me ne ki ha?
to saza us gharib ko Q dein.”
Cellphones can be irritating.
Have to buy a card.
Have to recharge battery.
Msgs get delayed
There is only one thing I love about it.
It connects me & you.

Bivi: ap ny pichly sal

Bivi: ap ny pichly sal
Eid py meri ami ko Lohy ka bed banwa k dia tha, is dafa kia irada hy?
Shohr: is sal us men current chornay ka irada hy
Wife ko Begum kyon kehte hain?
Kyonki shaadi ke baad saare gum to
Husband ke hisse mein aate hain or
Wife Be-Gum ho jaati hai.

Aisa Aadmi Jo Galati Par Ho

Aisa aadmi jo galati par ho
aur haar maan ley,
woh?
AQALMAND.
Aur
Aisa shakhs jo galati par na ho
magar phir bhi haar maan ley,
woh?
HUSBAND.
Husband: I could go to the end of the world for you.
Wife: Thanks, but promise me,
You will stay there for the rest of your life.

Pagal kuch bhi kar sakta hai!

WIFE , Tum Ne Kabhi Socha Hai K Meri Shaadi
Kisi Aur Se Ho Jaati To Kya Hota?”
HUSBAND ,
Nahi ,
Main ne kabhi Kisi Ka Bura Nahi Socha,
Wife: If I die what will you do?
Husband: I will be mad!
Wife: Will you marry again after I die?
Husband: Pagal kuch bhi kar sakta hai!

Jazbat ka izhar asaan lafzon mein krein

Wife to husband. Wife: Aaj mere tan,man mein aag laga do.
Husband ne patrol phenk k agg laga di.
Moral?
“jazbat ka izhar asaan lafzon mein krein”

Wife looking in the mirror

Wife looking in the mirror
I look horrible,
fat and ugly,
please say something nice to me.
Husband: Your eye sight is perfect!

Miss You

M: My lovely wife.
I: Is i am wrong in my sms?
S: Sex is not only thing in the life.
S: See, we have everything in our life you, me & our kids & good salaries and home also.

Y: You are everyting to me, my life my wife my jaan.
O: Our life is just a good enough for us. Alhumdullah.
U: U are the lucky one in my world… gave me our sweet family.

LOVE YOU!

Girlfriend is for fun,
Wife is for son,
Girlfriend is night partner,
Wife is life partner,
Girlfriend is tooty fruity,
While wife is Qismath pooti.

Husband & Wife

Husband:I played RACE last week a & Jenny was the name of my HORSE.
Wife:Sorry!
Next day the Wife hit him with the Frying Pan AGAIN!
Husband:Why?
Wife:ur Horse PHONED!
If I could rearrange the alphabet,
I would surely put U and I together

Jab sey begum

Jab sey begum ney mujhy murgha bana rakha hain
Main ney nazron ki tarhan sir bhi jhuka rakha hain
Bartano aj mere sir pey baraste q ho
Main ney dho dha key tumhain kitna saja rakha hai,
Roz leti he talashi wo police ki manind,
Pochti he kahan paison ko chupa rakha hai
Wohi dunya main muqaddar ka sikandar tehra
Jis ne

Wife: Kal rat tum ….

Wife: Kal rat tum mujhe neend
main galian kyon de rahe the?
Husband: Tumhey ghalatfehmi hoi hai.
Wife: Kesi ghalatfehmi?
Husband: Yehi k main neend main tha.

Wife: Tum mujhe kitna pyar karte ho?

Wife: Tum mujhe kitna pyar karte ho?
Pati: Shahjahan jitna.
Wife: Mere merne k bad Taj Mahal banaoge?
Pati: Maine to plot bhi le liya hai, tum hi der ker rahi ho.
Husband: Tum kaun ho!
Wife: Pagal hogaye kya, apni Biwi ko bhul gaye.
Husband: Nasha har gham bhula deta hai.

If kidney fails,

Husband: u will never succeed
in making that dog obeys u!
Wife: Well, it’s only a matter of patience,
I had a lot ov trouble wid u at first.
Husband & wife are like liver and kidney.
Husband is liver & wife is kidney.
If liver fails, kidney fails.
If kidney fails, liver manages with other kidney.

It’s YOU When u sM¡le.

A Sad girl was sitting with her husband
Husband: U r d second most beautiful girl, I’ve ever seen.
Girl: Who’s the first?
Husband: It’s YOU When u sM¡le.

A man in Hell asked Devil:

A man in Hell asked Devil:
Can I make a call to my wife?
After making call he asked how much to pay.
Devil : Nothing, Hell to Hell is Free.

Difference between Friend & Wife

U can Tell ur Friend
“U r my Best Friend”
But

Do u have courage tell to ur Wife
“U r my Best Wife?”

Pati Patni Sms

Patni: agar main mar gain to tum keya karoge?
pati: main pagal ho jaunga,
patni: tum dubara sadhi to nahi karogi na!
pati: kaya pata pagal log kuch v har sakta hai!

Year 1.Janu

Hw wman cal their husband in first six years
Year 1.Janu
Year 2.O G.
Year 3.Sunte ho?
Year 1.O bunty ka pappa
Year 1.Khan mar gaye?
Year 1.Tm ate ho k main aaon?
Man at medical store:I need poison Chemist: I can’t sell you.
Man shows his marriage certificate Chemist: Oh! sorry, I didn’t knew u had a prescription.

Wife: If I die wht ll you do?

Wife: If I die wht ll you do?
Husband: Main paagal ho jaun ga!
Wife: Will you marry again after I die?
Husband: Pagal kuch bi kar sakta hai
Dulha: Aaj se tum hi meri pooja ho,aarti ho,archna ho..
Dulhan: Sharmate huwe,,
aaj se aap b mere liye rahul ho,chetan ho,anand ho,sudip ho,akash ho,pardip ho.!

HUSBAND WIFE

HUSBAND WIFE me larai ho gai,husband ghar se offic chala giya
Raat ko phone kar ke pucha:”Khane me kiya hai
WIFE:zaher
HUBBY:tum kha kar so jao me ata hoon!
A wife never gives a thing
to her husband, whole the life.
what’s that ?
?
?
?
Any Guess
?
?
?
ok
that is a moment of peace.

Jab Is Ka Akhiri

One Dolatmand shaks Sadeed Bimaar Tha,
Jab Is Ka Akhiri Lamhat Kareeb Aye To Doctor Nai Jawab De Dia,
His wife Said:Tm Abhi Nahi mar Saktay,
Khuda Ka Liay Abhi Na Maro.
Martay Huay Shakhs Ne Jawab Dia:BEGUM Mat Ro,SABR Kro,AB m

Nobody teaches

Nobody teaches
volcanoes to erupt,
tsunamis to arise,
hurricanes to sway around,
and
no-one teaches
how to choose a wife
natural disasters just happen!!:

Police aur Ambulance

Bevi : Look A Thief Haz Enterd Our Kitchen
And He Iz Eating the Cake Prepard By Me
Husband: Whom Should I Call
Now Police aur Ambulance..

NATURAL DISASTERS JUST HAPPEN.

Nobody teaches
Volcanoes to erupt,
Tsunamis to devastate,
Hurricanes to sway around
&
no one teaches
How to choose a Wife,

NATURAL DISASTERS JUST HAPPEN.

The real art of conversation

The real art of conversation
is not only to say the
right thing at the right time.
But also to leave the wrong thing
unsaid at the most tempting Moment.

1 day child fish ask

1 day child fish ask da mother fish:Mom y we cant live on Earth ……Da Mother fish said 2 her child fish:Dear ….its
not a place 4 fish…its a place of selfish…

Big fights usually break relations

Big fights usually break relations.
But
Minor misunderstandings spoil relations.
And
The fact is spoiled relations
are more painful than broken ones.

Thoughts lead on to purpose

Thoughts lead on to purpose; purpose leads into actions; actions form habits; habits decide character; and
character fixes our destiny.

Humans tell the TRUTH

Humans tell the TRUTH in TWO situations:
ONE: to SAVE “WHAT” they are LOSING,
TWO: when they have ‘NOTHING’ to loose.

Watch ur thoughts

Watch ur thoughts, dey bcom words
Watch ur words,dey bcom actions
Watch ur actions,dey bcom habits
Watch ur habits,dey bcom character
Watch ur character,It bcoms your destiny

One simple tip

One simple tip to stay happy always.
Never think & speak about a 3rd person,
&
Never think what a 3rd person thinks & speaks about you.

Don’t spoil what U have by desiring what U don’t have coz what U have now is one of the many things U
once desired for. Good Day!

‘L i f e’
Is not an
‘i – P o d’
To listen your
Favorite Songs
It’s a
‘R a d i o’
You must
‘A d j u s t’
Yourself to enjoy,
Whatever comes in it…

The most difficult

The most difficult
lesson to lean is,

which hand you
hold for your life
or
which one to break off.

It is easy to enclose

It is easy to enclose the sea in drop but it is rather tough to control the people’s tongue. Don’t bother about people they are here to talk and not to solve or share sorrows and grieves…

Anger is a short madness.

Anger is a short madness.

Don’t allow it to ruin
long standing relations.

If you don’t respect yourself how can you expect others to respect you so always give respect to yourself. Take Care and Be Happy..

One Man Cried Wen

One Man Cried Wen
He had no shoes ,
But he stopped crying when
He saw a man without legs….
Life is full of Blessings ,
Sum time we Don’t understand it..!! !!

……..Think

“If you want something which u never had before,
do some thing which you have never done Before”
……..Think

You never get a second chance

You never get a second chance
to make a first impression
&
you never born for
the second time to make this life good
so make it good now.

The Man who Trims himself

The Man who Trims himself
To suit everybody will soon
Whittle himself away.

All the water in the ocean

All the water in the ocean
could never sink a ship
unless it gets inside.
Likewise all the pressures of life
can never hurt you,
unless you let them in.

The only way of finding

The only way of finding
the limits of the possible
is by going beyond them
into the impossible.

Half of sorrows we earn by expecting

Half of sorrows we earn by expecting
good things from wrong people.
and
Half of sorrows we earn by expecting
wrong things from good people…!!!

Beautiful Prayer

Beautiful Prayer
” Allah, when I lose hope because my plans have come to nothing…

Then help me to remember that,

Your Love is always greater than my disappointments,

&

Your Plans for my life are always better than my dreams..”

Don’t just say “I LOVE YOU”

Don’t just say “I LOVE YOU” to someone if you really don’t love the person, because sometimes it may hurt people!

Positive Attitude

Always have a
positive attitude in life.
There is something positive
In every person.
Even a stopped watch is right
Twice a day

Each moment of ur life

Each moment of ur life is a picture which u had never seen before. And which ull never see again so enjoy &
live life & make each moment beautiful….

Never b Proud,

Never b Proud,
For what u r & the Position u hold,
Bcoz after a Game of Chess,
the King & the Soldiers
go into the same box..!

Life is made of small jumps

Life is made of small jumps over great obstacles. it’s in the courage of getting thru them that makes life
challenging & exciting.

When you develop the ability

When you develop the ability
to listen to anything without losing
your temper or self-confidence,
it means you have become EDUCATED.

The word Trust

The word Trust is d basis of all relatioas but a small mistake made, can change its entire meaning. Like just a
missing ‘T’ can ‘RUST’ d relation!

Lucky means

Lucky means who get the opportunity.
Brilliant means who create the opportunity.
Winner means who use the opportunity.
Be a winner always.

Always REMEMBER

Always REMEMBER to 4GET those things that make u sad
But nvr FORGET to REMEMBER those things that make u glad.

If you miss an opportunity

“If you miss an opportunity
don’t fill ur eyes with tears.
It may hide yet another opportunity
lying in front of you”

To make our way

To make our way,
we must have firm resolve,
persistence, tenacity.
We must gear ourselves
to work hard all the way.
We can never let up

Full stop is not a real end

Full stop is not a real end,
Because we can form a sentence after that.
Like that in life,
Failure is not the real end,
It is the real beginning of success.

Never cry for any relation in life

Never cry for any relation in life
Because for the one whom you cry
Does not deserve your tears
And the one who deserves
Will never let you cry…

Don’t expect anything from life

Don’t expect anything from life, expectations hurt. When u don’t expect, every moment is a surprise & surprise brings happiness with it. Gud Day!

Happiness is like a butterfly

Happiness is like a butterfly,
u run after it, it keeps flying away.
If u stand still it comes & sits on ur shoulders.

Wish u the most happiest moments!

Effort is important,

Effort is important,
but knowing where
to make an effort
in your life
makes all the difference.

Get well quick,

Get well quick, you lazy bum, There’s lots of work to do. If you stay sick, it’s more work for me, And I’d rather it was for you.

Hey, good morning

Hey, good morning! Rise and shine! As you open your eyes to greet the morning sun, I wish that you would be well and fine.

The only way to keep

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not.

May good health remain

May good health remain in your body all the time, so your charm can always shine, and inspire others to become kind.

Take Good Care Of Yourself

Take Good Care Of Yourself
Friend. We Hope To See You Up And
Running And Back At Kommies Again
The Place Just Isn’t The Same
Without You

If wishes were flowers I”d send You A

If wishes were flowers I”d send You A
big bunch to say…. “Get Well Soon”

You Mean A lot to me….

You Mean A lot to me…. and so does your Health and
Happiness….. So Here”s a wish to say….
& Take good care of Yourself !

Heard that you”re not feeling well.

Heard that you”re not feeling well. So brought flowers for you to
make you feel Healthier and Happier. Get Well Soon!

Every King was once

Every King was once a crying baby
and
every great building was once a map.
It’s not important where u r TODAY,
BUT
where you will reach TOMORROW is important.

Dont show so much of love

Dont show so much of love and importance to anyone,
Bcz it creates a noncurable pain when they avoid u..

Nothing in the nature lives for itself

Rivers don’t drink their own water

Trees don’t eat their own fruit

Sun doesn’t give heat for itself

Moon doesn’t ever go on honeymoon

Flowers don’t spread fragrance for themselves

Moral:
Living for Others is the Rule of Nature

everything on earth is as a result of dreamz, they make the tommorow. so lets all dream to make the world a better place……..okanya phillip

Life is more strict than a teacher

Life is more strict than a teacher
A teacher teaches a lesson
and takes an exam.
.
.
.
.
But life takes an exam
and then teaches a lesson.

A negative thinker

A negative thinker see a difficulty in every opportunity,A positive thinker see an opportunity in every difficulty,wish u an optimistic life..

A Simple But Great Quotation..:

A Simple But Great Quotation..:
.
.
.
Don’t Trust Your Heart..
.
.
.
Because Its Not On The Right Side..;-)

What the word IMPOSSIBLE

What the word IMPOSSIBLE says I M Possible. So every thing which seems impossible is itself says that is possible.

If U Look for Gud

If U Look for Gud
U ll find Gud
If U look for Bad
U ll find Bad

In Life U always find

In Life U always find
What U look for
Only thing tht matter is
What U choose to see

GUD MORNNG